FundaÁ„o Maitreya
 
On the Threshold

de Maria

em 01 Jan 2008

  This article results from an informal conversation recorded by Dhammiko (Buddhist Monk) when still a postulant, with Maria. The theme is revealed in its philosophical and metaphysical profundity identified with the tradition of the Advaita Vedānta. The Advaita Vedānta, provides the key to exit from the illusion by the recognition with Brahma (n), in other words, to reach a state of Awareness that one was always ďHimĒ, which had been simply overshadowed in His purity and light, by ignorance.


ďThe Universe which Iíve createdĒ

Dhammiko -...itís recording...
Maria -...anh!?.
Dhammiko -... itís recording...now...
Maria -...Íia itís recording, ah, I thought it was a phone.
Dhammiko -...no...
Maria -...so little, here we probably wonít hear anything?..
Dhammiko -...it hears...to record this conversation...
Maria -...hum!., actually still today I was thinking, no, it was not properly thinking...in actual fact contemplating, on that idea which Iíve already spoken of yesterday, that it was me who created this Universe (grin), itís such a strange sensation, itís...ďthat it was me who created this Universe...Ē and I keep feeling more and more, by intuition or by a spiritual opening which is gradually occurring, how I am in a grand illusion, in other words, I am not this..., I live in some other plane...and from that plane I projected this, where I am, here with the physical body, and then, in the moment I ďopen my eyesĒ...in that moment, I return to that Dimension where I exist, where I always existed...and I see myself in that Dimension, I reveal myself in that Dimension where I Exist...and that caused me a certain apprehension, first because of the unknown...and then the emptiness, the unexpected, that is, to see me In That...since, I cease to see and be this, I cease, I mean, if all this is a creation of mine, what I am, where I am, you and all these people, are fruit of my imagination, when I am actually willing to ďopen my eyesĒ, or when Iím ready, that event of ďopening my eyesĒ means to be situated at that point of that dimension and then this (the world) ceases to exist...and here arises the fear of that ceasing to exist...
Dhammiko -...of that disintegration...
Maria -...itís a total disintegration!
Dhammiko -...just like a...
Maria -...do you realise? now...
Dhammiko -...disappears to the other side, just by awareness...
Maria -...no, it doesnít disappear, I mean, how am I going to face something that doesnít exist, which at the same time is so real for me?! How am I going to face this? But this is only mental, because in the moment Iím already on the other side, seeing all this as a delusion and procreation of mine, which doesnít exist anymore, there is no problem anymore, Iím going to be liberated. Now...that which I am confronted with is, if that moment of ďopening my eyesĒ, to which I call ďthe opening of the eyesĒ, is the moment of the passage of death? Is this my death? This is very curious, because even yesterday I was remembering, that it was when I was six years old that my experiences with the Master started, as far as I remember...and the Master used to come and talk about death...
Dhammiko Ė...when you were six years old?
Maria -...when I was six, which is absolutely, uncommon...So, what He used to tell me was, ďdeath is not what people think it isĒ, it was always this sentence that the Master gave me...when six years old...is it now, in this phase of mine, in my life, my end, relative to that point concerning what the Master spoke to me about death...do you see this?..Isnít this fantastic?..
Dhammiko -...itís not what?..
Maria -... itís not what people think it is, and which I still continue to think and, how many times I think about that phrase and say, ďwell, ok, I had already many experiences of death, I know very well what death is, Iím preparedĒ.
Dhammiko -...but...
Maria -...I donít find it particularly fulgurant...
Dhammiko -...but there is always a dread?..
Maria -...there is still, only because something new surges, but itís nothing remarkable, do you understand? Although, in a context of initiation, to understand what death is and the experience of death, involves a process of transcendence to all of us; today, that experience of mine, of death, is nothing special, but absolutely natural.
Dhammiko - Önaturally...and you are prepared...
Maria -...and I am prepared to go, however, it appears to me now, here, this Dimension (state of Awareness), to which I know I must ďopen the eyesĒ to remain there, actually to understand that I am there already...itís probable that it is that passage of death, I mean, there isnít a death, death doesnít exist, itís only a state of consciousness...
Dhammiko -...death is only a...
Maria -...we say this, death is a state of consciousness, but this comes from the mental... (grin)...and this is not mental, this already is!
Dhammiko -...death is illusion...death is only an illusion...
Maria -...naturally, death doesnít exist, in other words, itís a passage. It was me who created this illusion, ďit was me who created this UniverseĒ (Cosmos), where I am and think Iím going to die, but Iím going to continue to existÖ (grin)...
Dhammiko -...creation itself is death and it is within that creation that one enters...and perhaps Maria is talking already from the side of your divine awareness, speaking from the other side, ergo aware of the other side, but since there is still presence in the manifested part...
Maria -...evidently...there or here I exist; there arenít two worlds but one only!
Dhammiko -...since there is still presence in death, which is, as if death were here...
Maria -...yes, and in actual fact, in this earthly dimension, death for me still exists just like it exists for other people...though in a more comprehensible manner, maybe more better prepared for the passage, than the majority of people...but in a certain way, I still see death as any other person sees it. Now, this that is presented to me, is different; the other day I remained aware of something different, unexpected, transcendent and of something that no one ever will be able to explain, lets say, Iím speaking to you, because you might have some understanding of it, so, I think you understand what Iím saying, but, this cannot be told to someone else just like that. If I tell someone whoís not prepared, ďyou are part of a creation of mineĒ, the person will react and say ďbut who is this one, who does she think she is?Ē...(laugh)...
Dhammiko -...but when Maria is speaking about that, are you referring only to you or likewise to the others?..
Maria -...thatís the great problem, which is that I donít understand yet if actually that ďUniverse which I createdĒ and even everything which exists surrounding me, including you, is all pure illusion...(laugh)...you Dhammiko, in this case donít exist, you are no more than my delusion!?. (laugh)...this I find interesting...
Dhammiko -...because it is...everything at the level of perception and manifestation...itís all a creation which will end...
Maria -...yes, but I donít know, if it is this Universe of mine, a creation of mine, in which you are part of that illusion which I created... do you understand?... or if I, simply, am part of an illusion, and, created this illusion relative to myself... or still if that illusion comprises all the Universe (created by Someone) wherein I move myselfÖ, this Universe wherein I move myself itís all that what I see, including the sea and that boat, the buildings back there, you, this cafť and all the rest...ah!! (grin) this is what is an incognita for me and which is very interesting...and then, with each day passing by, gradually this is becoming more present, more present and more aware.
Dhammiko-...but that is not personal?!.
Maria -...now...eeh!..well...it is personal and it is not...I mean, itís personal until I make it personal, until Iím in the physical body and have my personality...
Dhammiko -...and have your personality whilst understanding that you have it and it is processing mentally...
Maria -...exactly, now...I donít know yet if this refers to a passage, I mean to a death...I still donít know in fact if this refers to a passage, ergo to a death, it being possible that I might be close to the physical death, but, in that case, itís different from that which Iíve already realised, since I have been through and go through many states, experiences of death or many experiences of death in a state of absolute union with God and great felicity in that passage, which plainly fulfilled and fulfils me with Love in a union with God and, therefore I was and I am in fact, Me, This! Great!
But now itís not like that, it occurs in a different way, much more intelligent, very clear, rational and without the mystical aspect...do you understand?..at the same time itís in another dimension of exceptional intelligence. When I reach That, I think that it will be a complete illumination, if that happens to be possible...but itís different. Itís a little strange...it is strange but itís a fabulous sensation, at the same time...
Dhammiko -...doesnít it have to do with the total fusion in the cosmic consciousness?..
Maria -...that exists, Dhammiko, because I have that fusion already...
Dhammiko -...maybe what Maria is talking about is something even more transcendent...
Maria -...itís more than that, because...I have that fusion; there is always a state of Love, immense, in a connection with God, it exists always with intelligence and Love...but now it is as if I would go to that Dimension, confronting my death, not for a mystical state of felicity ďOh, itís so great to let me goĒÖ, but for a real state...real, eeeehhh...rational, rational might not be the right term but, intelligent...so strangeÖ intelligent, without the mystical part which gives support. If there is a mystical part (that is the support), if there is a state of union with God where the culmination of that union was achieved, this is extremely simple, but itís not of that union that Iím speaking, since that union is the one where even someone can tell us that we are going to be crucified; I understand perfectly what the Crucifixion of the Christ was for example...He lived so happy in God that He didnít mind...in actual fact there is a part of Him that finally accepts that death, though hard as it might have been in that moment, but, in the end, He went to death accepting, and why? Because we believe that He had that union with God. At a certain point of my life I felt that, I have already lived what was the felicity of Christ in death...thence, when someone hits that state of union with God, there is a mystical and beatific state in which one can say or we can comprehend that, even dying today or tomorrow, crucified, one way or another, whether it be dolorous, although in that transcendent ambient there is nothing dolorous...we accept that with the highest felicity because we are in a union with God and this felicity is what matters, ergo, this is absolutely acceptable, there is no fear because we are in that felicity. But this is different, this is Ė that felicity exists, itís here within, it has always been Ė but the moment of that understanding, of that passage to the other Dimension is through an absolutely intelligent mode...intelligent naked and RAW, do you see what I mean?..there isnít the beatific side here supporting the fear or the letting go of fear, I mean, it is the confrontation... (laugh)...I donít know if youíre grasping this...it is as if a child had been given a sweet or a candy, and the child grabs the candy and leaves to delight in it. That union with God Iím speaking of is that one which is characterised by great felicity, to the point of not bothering myself to die in whatever way it may be, even if I am crucified, that is the candy which is given to me (the felicity of the mystical realisation with the Divinity), in order for me to do that passage without problems...but here, in this case now, no one gives me the candy...
Dhammiko -...itís not necessary...
Maria -...itís a will...
Dhammiko -...the candy is already within, it already is...
Maria -...the candy was here a long time ago, it was savoured already a long time ago, ďnow, you will have to use your will, because you have grown already and you will have to give and be that willĒ...and I know that in that moment, that passage will have to be through my will, the moment I will be willing to ďopen the eyes...Ē
Dhammiko -...so, it entails a step...it entails a step and a passage...
Maria -...yes...
Dhammiko -...and it is intelligent...
Maria -...it is intelligent, itís that passage I speak about in the ďAvatāraĒ, wherein I have an experience of death in Azores, where God tells me, ďThe point of passage has to be in a conscientious and intelligent wayĒ...itís this!
Dhammiko -...and it is consummated...
Maria -...yes...
Dhammiko -... and it is consummated within the flesh...
Maria -...yes...
Dhammiko -...in the flesh...and that is the transcendence of the flesh...
Maria -...yes, it is that...didnít the Master say: Father, why hast thou forsaken me?
Dhammiko -...it is the true transcendence...
Maria -...exactly, it is that Intelligent Will without any candy at all...now I, ďopen the eyesĒ and go because I want to go, the illusion is finished...I want to go, want to go whether to that passage (death), or to that Dimension where I stay more illuminated but, I continue to live on earth..., illuminated in the sense of more illumination, we may say, Iím not saying that Iím enlightened, Iím speaking in degrees of illumination, thatís what Iím talking about...hence, there is a passage (expansion of Consciousness), which will leave me more illuminated in the sense of more intelligence, more detached from everything, seeing everything with more reality and not letting myself once again be dragged by emotions, since all this is an illusion...to see life in a way more real...or, in fact, as I mentioned before, that passage happens, the physical death, the passage which God always told me to be the ďconscientious passageĒ, as a matter of fact there is a conversation with the Master where I say: ďI go because Iím going to be with youĒ, Iím not going because I accept dying, saying, ďMy God now take meĒ...
Dhammiko -...it is a will...
Maria -...there is a conscious will...
Dhammiko -...itís a conscious will of the integration...
Maria -...exactly, I go, simply, I GO, now I go...
Dhammiko -...of the voluntary transcendence, relatively of going, encounter to return and integrate, to completely transcend the flesh and consummate the blood of Christ in fact...
Maria -...itís very interesting...(meanwhile the mobile phone rings)...yes?..
Dhammiko -...the consummation has to occur through an intelligent way....
Maria -...aannnh?..
Dhammiko -...it has to be through an intelligent way doesnít it?..
Maria -...it does...it does...
Dhammiko -...and itís something that it is possible to do still here and now...
Maria -...because of that the Master has let Himself be carried to death...it was also an intelligent hand over.
Dhammiko -...and Maria is even here referring in relation to the physical death...
Maria -...to His physical death...
Dhammiko -...even in the conscientious hand over, completely with arms wide open, even to go to death...
Maria -... He knew He was going to die, even before the others handed Him over...at the spiritual level the time had come.
Dhammiko -...because He knew...
Maria -...He knew...obviously.
Dhammiko -...but there is still a certain fear...Maria?..
Maria -...eeeehhh....itís a jump into the unknown...I mean, actually itís not a jump into the unknown, it is...I think that if it is fear, itís due to the disillusionment that I myself am going to suffer, to see the illusion where I was...do you understand?..
Dhammiko -...I suppose yes...so we may say that it is a disintegrating disillusionment, conscious...
Maria -...yes, it is...
Dhammiko -...and disillusioning at the same time...
Maria -...yes, to see at the same time where I am?!.
Dhammiko -...itís an implosive process, withdrawing towards the inside in which there is a gain of awareness concerning everything that was spent in the manifestation of ephemeral reality...ephemeral I mean, which had its reasons, didnít it...
Maria -...yesÖreally! ďThe Universe which Iíve created!!!...Ē (incredulity).
Dhammiko -...and that can happen with any person?..
Maria -...that is not yet a certainty...maybe I will only know when I go there, to the other dimensionÖ I can only tell you after death...(laugh)Ö
Dhammiko -...because is also part of your very personal experience...
Maria -...exactly...and this is my delusion...and if this is my delusion, when I pass to the other side Iíll understand that it was I who wished to come to this delusion, it finished here, I wanted to finished it by will. I believe though, that all the people will one day get to have this delusion. I am part of a Being, and that Being comprises of all those Monads...the Monads which are all here on the earth for instance...
Dhammiko -...and after the reintegration...
Maria -...and afterwards when a person reintegrates oneself completely in that Being...it is Him...
Dhammiko -...it is as if it was ONE...exactly...
Maria -... Him... ďtherefore I created this Universe...Ē
Dhammiko -...of course...
Maria -...so I am Him...
Dhammiko -...and each person that will also be reintegrated is going to feel that they can live the same thing...
Maria -...exactly...
Dhammiko -...that is the reintegration of all...
Maria -...itís this, I integrated myself in Him, I am Him...then the phrase I spoke and which looks completely insane... ďthe Universe which Iíve createdĒ, finishes like this, that integration of mine in that Being, which actually is the One God, The Creator of this Universe...
Dhammiko -...that is the ONE...
Maria -...it is the ONE, but by my integration in Him, I am Him...
Dhammiko -...you transform yourself into the ONE and see the things as ONE...
Maria -...in the ONE and I am Him, thus in that moment I Am, when I say ďit was me who created this UniverseĒ, itís me the own God speaking, well...this cannot be told to just anyone...
Dhammiko -...but it was this that I told Maria yesterday, itís your part, itís your divine awareness from God that is already speaking...
Maria -...but speaking about this, I donít want to...there is a kind of apprehension, because I am what?..How can I say, I am God!..Whoever listens to this will say ďsheís a nutterĒ...I donít even want to think about that, but in the end that is what I Realise.
Dhammiko -...and probably that is what everyone, one day, will also tell after being reintegrated, since they will sense precisely the same thing, taking account, they unite themselves to the ONE...
Maria -...exactly...
Dhammiko -...and when all, be it ten thousand, twenty thousand or million...
Maria -...arrive at that union...
Dhammiko -...unite themselves to the ONE...
Maria -...the manifestation ends...
Dhammiko -...we are all ONE, we will all realise that we were created in manifestation and recreation...
Maria -...if Dhammiko gets to that point, you will realise that I am the illusion of your creativity...
Dhammiko -...and I am the illusion of your creativity...
Maria -...exact...in this moment, where I have already reached that point and therefore you are part of my illusion, I created you...it was me who created you...and all these people who are here...but if it is you Dhammiko having that perception, then, it was you who created me...this is very interesting, this is a conversation of metaphysical and philosophical profundity, pure Advaita Vedānta, that not everyone can understand...
Dhammiko -...I once read a...
Maria -...I will try to write...you Dhammiko can write from there (the recorder), but I will try to write that which is disappointing, that which Iím living to get to that point of comprehension...
Dhammiko -...I once read something, which for me had an incredible significance, that is...even a little leaf...
Maria -...what is that?..
Dhammiko -...itís a phrase...
Maria -...of who?..
Dhammiko -...I donít remember anymore of whom it is...but it is a phrase that says, ďeven the fall of a little leaf from a tree that falls in the Autumn, generates an impact in the whole Universe and has repercussion in the whole Universe and in all of us...Ē
Maria -... thatís the law of cause and effect...this background music is not appropriate at all for this conversation...have you noticed?
Dhammiko -...it must have been purposefully played for our talk...
Maria -...itís always the opposite force, here trying to disturb...but yes, it is the law of cause and effect...
Dhammiko -...and itís funny, I had now also a kind of a notion...itís like if the ONE had...the ONE is actually spread through everywhere or everything...
Maria -...Yes, the ONE is as if it was a Being of which all of us make a part of, this is very much in accordance also with the philosophy of the Jains, in which there is a Being, Unique, of which all of us make a part...and that those which are capable of reaching His head, are the ones who attained the illumination. But it is not only in Jainism no, in Hinduism, it is Prajāpati, to which one can apply, the same notion or concept...and therefore, all of us make a part of Him. From here, on one hand, accrues an explanation concerning the castes, or division of castes; the ones of the head or born from the mouth are the Brahmins or superior caste, those who are on the feet, are the ones of the lower caste. In actual fact, each time a being becomes aware of this, of what weíve been talking about, the being will identify his own as being Him...because it is a part of Him...a cell of Him or a vein of His body, is you...the cell nothing is, separated, without the other connections inside there... the cell and the other cells are what constitute you, then everyone of us are the ones who constitute this Being...interesting isnít it?..
Dhammiko -...exactly...
Maria -...thus, when one of us, when a little cell or whatever we are, a little point of the littlest of that body gains awareness, of the Awareness which is, that is Him...the I Am, then one can also say, ďit was me who created this UniverseĒ...this is very interesting, itís even frightening...
Dhammiko -...we are all connected...
Maria -...yes, to say that, to sense that, in the end we are so little, we are such a little thing, then suddenly we see ourselves in that Dimension, in an opening of the eyes...
Dhammiko -...itís a passage...to the other shore...
Maria -...itís interesting, whether in reality the passage is death, or in reality it will be more a state of awareness which I will acquire. People think that the path is thus something, very easy, that we have already everything done...that it is easy to reach there, but to reach where...? The path is so long...the path is long because, it is trodden in stages, and the experience will each time be stronger...the expansion of awareness doesnít have an end...itís infinite...
These waves, when they hit there from one side to the other make a SOUND...the OMÖnow itís rising (the tide)...the other day I got there to Saint Johnís end (ponta de S„o Jo„o), and...ah! What a great ecstasy! At home I had sensed that I should go there to Saint Johnís end (ponta de S„o Jo„o - Estoril). There, is felt a very strong vibration, a very peculiar vibration, different from this one here. When I arrive at S. Johnís end the heart expands immediately...and here is necessary to walk a bit for that to happen..., but because I come from there (Cascaisí end - ponta de Cascais), of doing so many kilometres, I donít dare myself to go anymore to S„o Jo„o...but in that day I felt I should go there. As soon as I arrived to the beach (the tide was low), there were half a dozen people there at most, and then, I started to feel a felicity so greatÖ, I looked like a nutcase; fortunately I was facing the sea and no one could see me (laugh), my heart started to open, happy, happy, happy for being thereÖ I should have been with some kind of blockage in the heart and there it disappeared, it was necessary to go there, to that end, to see the sea. It is a very special place, very, very special...
Thus is the Path; it is necessary to goÖto go always a little moreÖ
Dhammiko -...where is it?..
Maria -...itís there on the end...
Dhammiko -...ah! on that end...
Maria -...itís on Saint Johnís end...we can go there, shall we go?...
Dhammiko -...letís go...
Maria -...so letís pay.
   


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